Wednesday, June 27, 2007

What I've Done

June was supposed to last forever.

It didn't. In past years, a summer has proved to be an eternity that doesn't seem to last long enough. This time it seems too short in every capacity.
What it really comes down to is that I've wasted this month. Sure, I hung with friends (about 3), had a handful of good times, logged an easy 10 hours of blogging, but other than that I've been a complete couch potato. It's ironic, then, that I came into this summer emotionally full-force, ready to have a great time, since I haven't had a great month as a whole. You see, when I first came into this, I had big ideas of what to accomplish with my new free times. Write a play, start that band (for real this time), and just have a generally awesome time with a variety of friends. What I found tonight, however, is that that is not the makings of a great summer. A teenager who comes into his summer dreaming spends it dreaming. What I've missed out on this go-round is the little moments. Little moments like sitting in a friend's garage at 1:30 in the morning, eating cold pizza, and reminiscing about the good old days of pokemon trading. Things I'll remember a little better than "Apartment", "Larry is Stuck in Time" or even "Diddy Kong Racing" (Solo, that is- Together it'll be a blast).
Indeed, for the last few months I feel like I've put my life on auto-pilot. I don't remember why I ever stopped "seizing the day", but somewhere along the way I became content to let life pass me by, as long as I got some indulgence now and again.
Well, that contentment is gone. There comes a point when you're sitting beneath a pine tree by the side of the road at 2 in the morning, trying your best to remember the opening lines of "Two Coins", and you realize it might be nice to have someone there to remind you. Whether that someone is a friend, or whether you could actually unpocket a girl's lips and the "two coins" of her eyes, companionship is such. This is why I text some of you at 2 in the morning.
I've found that the majority of my posting since I've returned has been more or less poetic bullshit. I used to come on here and talk about things that really epitomized me, and they were shallow and uninteresting. Now, in an attempt to find a deeper me, my posts have become very much a congregation of random profound-ish thoughts from the day which I end up linking with some forced metaphor. I'm not going to say I regret it, I'm hatching. Just help me find my inner blogger.
So there's your random poetic bullshit for the night. Now, here's a bit of the old me. Maybe I can find a blend someday.
Good news for State Radio fans- New single on JUly 16th, plus "Year of the Crow" album drops September 18th. Oh, and I'm totally seeing Transformers now that they're using "What I've Done" to promote it, primarily because no one besides Warner Bros. and Machine Shop have had the balls to support a Linkin Park which doesn't scream it's head off.

'Til next time I care this much.

-OSK

I stick loneliness
Your lips
And the two coins of your eyes
Into my pocket, yeah yeah

2 comments:

Juicy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Juicy said...

little moments= all I ever wanted from summer in the first place...