The Race, Part Trois (Of Trois)

Well, there go three seasons of XC. It's astounding (and it makes me feel really old) to think that I've only one to go. I honestly can't believe it's been 3; it feels more like 2. This may be because freshman year's season was fairly uninteresting to me, as I had few friends on the team, being a freshman. However, this year I very much feel that I am a sophomore living in a Junior world. I don't feel like I've gotten older; I can't justify in my mind the authority (by means of intimidation) that comes with being an upperclassman. Rather, it feels that the world has gotten smaller, and me no bigger. Unlike when I was a sophomore and I found it easy to relate to the freshman and befriend them, this year's crew seem to be very hard to relate to (The protege search lives on, fear not). In any case, being bigger on the team has led me to analyze my position on the team. Depending on which way you look at it, this was either an awesome or dissappointing season for me. On the one hand, my new PR is about 1:10 faster than my PR last year (Though I'm not sure how good of an indicator this is, seeing as three of the courses we ran this year were absolute pancakes, one of which we ran twice). On the other hand, my position on the team has dropped considerably. While at the beginning of the season I was fighting for #2, I have now landed myself in the #5 spot. Frankly, the experience is rather confusing: I improve as the season progresses, but drop back in the lineup. I suppose the only real answer to this must be that my body requires much more conditioning and nurture to excel, as my training as is is not sufficient. This is most likely do to my psuedo-slacking over teh summer, a time when I ran wrecklessly, always going much too fast and tiring myself out, and hit the weight room about 4 times in total. This training ahs left me virtually unable to maintain what I should be capable of for 5K. But I don't mean to bitch; all this means is I must not let myself slack, lest my racing career become the very definition of a tragedy.
But then there's the other race, that race which we all must train for but have no desire to run: The race for good grades in quick time. This race, like that on the XC course, does not always turn a good benefit when you train well. Why is it that subjects I slack on I do well in, but those I really apply myself in I do not? This week is not a prime example of this, as it was the week of the play. I barely did any homework, as four hours of every night (not counting practice) was taken up by rehearsal. My philosophy became study for tests, study for quizzes, skip homework. Most of my teachers were sympathetic, and it is not the school's tolerance that I wish to criticize. Rather, I wish to criticize the cruel, ironic hand of the education Gods who decided that the tests I actually put hours into studying would screw me over anyways. You see, I have deep fear for my educational future. I came to the realization this week, up on stage, that I truly enjoy theater. Be it taxing, and whether I'm good or bad at it, performing the play this year was some of the most fun I've had. Whether it be acting or writing, I want to pursue the arts. I fear, however, that my apparent inability to push for good grades in other classes which I doubt will have any effect on my future will prevent me from going to a college where I can pursue these artistic endeavors. Try, try, try again, but for what?

-OSK

I'll lay off the "sequel-posts" for a while, try to get back into a regular groove.